What Could I Be Doing Differently?

I find myself constantly asking that about parenting.  People have said it's the hardest job you'll ever have and it didn't take me long to realize they are right.  I find myself full of doubt, lacking clarity, and frozen in my own mind not knowing how to handle certain situations.  I know I'm not alone, but that doesn't help me in the heat of the moment when I feel like running away from home.  I'm happy to say I've fought that urge thus far, but I don't like the feeling to even surface.  
I want it to be perfect and rosey every day.  I want to come home to children who are respectful, cheery, helpful, and never fight.  But when I look to myself, do I model those same characteristics every day?  Nope.  So why should I expect any more from my children?  I (we) are their role models.  We teach them the behaviors they have.  When my son gets angry and raises his voice, I know it's because he's heard me do that to him.  When he gets frustrated and immediately calls for help instead of continuing to try on his own, I know he's seen me do the same.  Friends, like it or not, our children are our mirrors.  They are who they are because of us.  
A recent sermon really resonated with me about being a disciple of Christ.  When the series began, I never thought little old me could disciple anyone.  I was the one who needed to be discipled.  I mean, what do I know?  Can I spout off verses from the Bible by heart?  Nope.  Do I know and understand every story in the Bible and can I discuss them with others like I know what I'm talking about?  Sure can't.  But can I live my life the way Jesus did?  Can I listen with compassion, feel with empathy, and react with love?  It's hard, but with God's guidance, yes I can!
When our kids are driving us crazy, there's some driving force behind it.  If we're lucky we can figure it out and remove that variable.  Sometimes we're not so lucky.  Those are the times they need our love most.  Yes, we'll have to dig from our pinky toes to find an ounce of it, but that's the only thing that will see us through.  
When they rub their snotty noses on our freshly laundered blouse and gently lay their head on our shoulder, all they need is love.  Snot washes out.  
When they are talking a mile a minute, asking 10,000 questions, all while you're trying to read a recipe to cook dinner, all they want is your love and attention.  Dinner may not be perfect, but that's okay.
When they fight with their siblings and run like banshees through the house, respond with love and attention.  Take a moment and run with them.  The laundry, dishes, or whatever can wait.
When they don't listen because they think what they're doing is more important.  React with love and remind yourself that you often do the same to them.  Take note and start with yourself before reprimanding them.
I'm hoping that by writing this out, I will be able to recall these ideas when I suddenly find myself in fight-flight-or-freeze mode.  I want to be able to drum up all the compassion and empathy I can muster and handle the situation with love.  As Stephanie, from A Wide Mercy, so eloquently put it, "We all need love the most in the moments when we feel the worst.  If I skipped the gruesome part of mothering I would also miss the chance to show them love."   

You are what you eat

One of the things I'm most passionate about is food.  Eating it, sourcing it, preparing it, learning about it, anything that has to do with food is of interest to me.  This has been a gradually formed love and not something that happened overnight.  I used to be the world's pickiest eater, eating only macaroni and cheese and grilled cheese sandwiches.  It's a wonder I ever went to the bathroom with all that cheese!  It wasn't until I lived in the sorority house in college that I began to expand my palate.  We had an awesome cook, who we called Gar-Bear, that just had a way of making us want to try new things.  I'm so thankful he opened my eyes to a world other than cheese!  Don't get me wrong, I still love cheese, but now I love a lot more.  
Once I began cooking for myself and searching for new recipes, I began to explore the world of healthy eating.  What I quickly learned is that the healthy food is not where the money's at for large corporations.  More often than not, the healthy alternatives in the grocery are double, if not triple the price of their lesser counterpart.  It's sickening to read the laundry list of fake ingredients in those "lesser" counterparts, many of which I can't even pronounce.  
I'm not here to preach about what our government should or should not do but I do want to make you aware of the the food world in which we live.  Here are 2 links that both exemplify what is going on behind the scenes in our government.  The first is a story of corn.  Sounds boring, but I found myself immersed in this article about why you rarely find organic corn at the local farmer's markets.  Reading what our government has allowed to happen over time is mind-blowing to me.   
The second link is a personal, real life story from a local blogger, The Lexington Streetsweeper.  He tells of a recent maddening experience at one of the big box grocery stores, whereby he witnessed our government's Food Stamp policy at work.  I'm thankful he was persistent and handled the situation the way that he did.  It's truly a crime the way sugary, processed, big company food is glorified for those who can't afford anything better, don't know any better, or aren't allowed to choose differently.
I really do hope that my one voice will team with others to make a difference.  Until then, I'll continue to protest the junk and go for the real food.  Real food that was grown by local farmers who are just trying to make an honest living like my grandparents did many decades ago.  These are the same grandparents who lived well into their 80's and 90's, numbers our youth are likely to never see at the rate we're going.  That is all.

It's Been A Long Time

Hello, friends!  I hope you haven't all given up on me, but I wouldn't blame you if you had.  I appreciate all the comments and emails checking in on me to make sure things were okay.  Yes, everything is just fine, I just needed a break.  
You see, this little blog started as a way for me to share the things "I" enjoy and it spiraled into my trying to post things I thought "YOU" would enjoy.  While I am all about pleasing others, I don't want to do it to the point that it becomes something I am not.  I want to be real.  That will mean pictures that are not gallery quality.  That will mean parenting tales that aren't all smiles and giggles.  And that will mean that when I feel like I need to take a break to be with my family, I won't feel guilty for not posting a certain number posts each week.  I'll do the best I can and hopefully inspire you, make you laugh, and maybe even educate you along the way.  Here's to a fresh start!
I've missed you all!  Even though I haven't been posting, I've still been reading your blogs, sometimes just as a lurker, but still staying up in your business.  I'm too nosey to quit it all together.  Well, nosey and genuinely interested!  I've bookmarked countless recipes from your various blogs, smiled at countless family photos, laughed at many videos, and been inspired by so many DIY and home projects/improvements.  While the blog world can be overwhelming and make me feel somewhat inferior at times, I am truly amazed at the skill and talent level of the bloggers I've found along the way.
Here are some of the things I've spied over the last few months.  We'll catch up soon on our summer fun and daily life happenings.  I plan to do a whole post on recent recipes we've drooled over.  Until then, be inspired!
Is there a more serene looking place than this?  I'm not sure I'd ever be able to leave once I got there.  How could this be so close to me, yet I've never heard about it.  Southern Living, you're letting me down!

Colin's teacher is expecting and I'm already on the hunt for the perfect gift.  Isn't this the cutest baby book?  They sure didn't make them like this 6 years ago!

Is this not the most awesome-ist party ever?  Wouldn't you be so psyched if you walked in and saw this?  I'm not sure I'd ever leave this room.  Game?  What game?

 
Just when you think there are no honest people left in the world (you haven't met my husband if you believe this!), someone goes and does something that truly moves you.  What a wonderful ending to a wonderful story!  This makes me slightly less cynical.

  On that note, I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend.  The weather here has been absolutely perfect and I'm hoping it continues through the weekend.  I'm off to a lovely local winery for a dinner in the vines!  Sure to be a great time!

Mother's Day 2013

Well, they can't all be good ones.  It wouldn't be real life if every Mother's Day just magically transformed into the best day ever.  Wes joked and said next year he was going to get me what I really wanted, a day without the kids.  Even that wouldn't classify as a great day because I'd spend the day wishing they were there with me.  
Some days I just don't fly at full speed.  My flag only flies at half mast and I'm irritable.  Yes, I said it, I can be irritable.  And if you meet a parent who says she never has a day like that, run the other way because lightning might be about to strike.
Bring a mom is a tough job.  It's also a very fulfilling, joyous, gratifying, and rewarding job.  However, as a mom of 2 young kids, the tough days tend to outweigh the super days.  As much as I try to focus on the positive the truth is, we're in a serious learning and transition time.  I'm learning to be the best mom I can be, all while realizing I'm not perfect and 50 other not-so-fantastic traits about myself.  Meanwhile, my children are learning what buttons to push, how to cope with their emotions, how to share, and all the other life skills that we somehow take for granted and think came preprogrammed into their little minds.  

Being a mom doesn't always mean being in control.  That's a hard one for me.  Just because you know they need a nap and desperately want them to take a nap (or go to bed at 5pm), doesn't mean it's going to happen.  No amount of force - I've tried - is going to physically make their little eyelids close.  No amount of bribery, coercing, or reasoning is going to make a strong-willed, opinionated, 5-year old take a nap when he doesn't want to.  Part of me wants to praise him for standing his ground because that will serve him well later in life when peer pressure rears its ugly head, but the other part of me, the part that is in the here and now wants to throttle him.  Nap = Sanity.  That equation doesn't balance when one of the components is negative.  Sometimes though, you have to wave the white flag and move on to Plan B.  Start praying for the sun to go down early so you can sneak in an early bedtime without them noticing.  
No matter what kind of day it's been, the fact that I came to play is all that matters.  Sure I may have days when I yell too much, don't feed them enough vegetables (gasp!), let them watch too much tv, but at least I tried.  Some days I may try less than others, but I was there.  It's unrealistic to think that you can give 100% of yourself every day to every person in your life.  I lived in that make believe world for a long time.  It's painful at the end of the day to realize you fell short...again...and again.  At some point you have to be content with giving it your best and realizing you can learn from your mistakes and short comings and hopefully give it another try tomorrow.  That's one thing we have, hope for tomorrow.  By the time we get this whole parenting thing all figured out, they'll be grown and on their own.  Then we can either write a book or guide our children with their children.  Now I feel old.  
I take my hat off to all the mother's.  By coming to play each day, you are putting your best foot forward.  They won't all be noteworthy days that the little lady at the coffee shop was talking about when she said to, "Enjoy every minute.  They're only young once."  No, you won't enjoy every minute.  Yes, you will wish away certain phases of their life.  But, yes you will be a great mom who is remembered and revered by her children for her love, not her mistakes.  Happy Mother's Day!

Thoughts

Although I'm not one for New Year's resolutions, I do like the idea of a new year representing a fresh start.  There are plenty of things I have to work on but focusing on the negative is something I'm trying to get past.  Lately I feel like my life is passing me by and I'm missing out on the joy.  I might have a full plate but it's up to me to make the most of it.  We're only here for a short time and I want it to be fun and meaningful.    

This quote from 320 Sycamore pretty much sums it up for me.

As I've mentioned before, I tend to be somewhat of a perfectionist.  That's good, but only to a point.  As one of my favorite authors (oh heck, it's the only author that I've read in the last 10 years!), Gretchen Rubin, so accurately said:

via

As I feel myself rush around from point A to point B, I want to be mindful.  I want to be mindful of the impact my self-inflicted stress is having on my family and myself.  I want to breathe into my heart and remind myself that it's okay if everything doesn't get done today, or get done exactly as I had it planned in my head.  I want to remind myself that my boys would rather have me than a professional meal.  I want to remind myself that my husband needs me to model patience and kindness so that he will want to mimic the same behavior.  I want to slow down and see things I've never seen before.  I want to allow my brain time to rest and not constantly be thinking of the next task.  Simply put, I want to bring the fun back into my life.
I know it's possible.  I know it's there.  I just have to dig it out of the corner, dust it off, and embrace it!  I am fun, darn it!  
So if you live around me, let's do something fun.  Let's do something for ourselves.  Let's do something with our kids.  Let's live it up!  

30 Days of Thankfulness - Days 26 & 27

I am thankful for the ability to provide for my family.  Every day I see homeless or less fortunate people walk by my window.  While I'm unaware of their situation as to how or why they are where they are, it still breaks my heart to see them in the sad shape they are in.  I have a tendency to be a skeptic and assume they are begging for money to support a habit, or not using the money wisely, but I need to learn to help in other ways. A few days ago, I witnessed a guy in a wheelchair begging for money.  As I looked up from my desk, I could see that he was putting on an act of being mentally challenged and perhaps he wasn't even wheelchair bound.  I heard him change his speech to that of a retarded person and yet, the man continued to listen.  He didn't give him any money - and I was relieved.  Instead, he walked next door as planned and got his lunch.  But what he did next was heart-warming.  He not only bought himself lunch, he bought the guy in the wheelchair a sandwich.  As he left the restaurant, the guy in the wheelchair was still begging for money on the same corner.  The guy stopped and gave him the sandwich.  I know he had to feel a sense of pride that he had helped someone less fortunate out.   Sadly, that's not where the story ends.  The guy in the wheelchair suspiciously looked in the bag, folded it back up, shoved it in the back of his seat, and went right back to begging for money.  A fellow street person walked by about that time and the guy in the wheelchair had miraculously lost his slurred speech, regained normal use of his previously crippled arm, and seemed bothered that someone had bought him a sandwich instead of giving him money.  My faith in humanity is often tainted by scenarios like these.  Too many times I've heard of people trying to take advantage of other people's generosity and it just sickens me.  I want to help those truly in need and it's becoming increasingly hard to distinguish.   I have supported local food programs in the past for this very reason.  As much as I'd like to heal the world all by my lonesome, I've learned to support those larger organizations who have taken on the full-time job of doing the same thing.  They are able to hold individuals accountable and can better regulate who receives their services.  So as a Part 2 of this post, I am thankful for food banks and other agencies trying to nourish those that want to be nourished.

Lexington Rescue Mission

God's Pantry

via

30 Days of Thankfulness - Days 22-25

I am thankful that our families live close enough that we can see them without much fuss.  My family lives about 20 minutes across town and Wes' family lives about 3 hours east of here.  While we don't get to see them as often as we should, it's nice to know they're just a short drive away.  

I am thankful that Colin and Sawyer have cousins near their age to play with.  Growing up, my sister and I did not have any relatives that were close in age (or location) and I was always envious of my friends who did.  I love the classic image of a house full of people on the holidays.  It just exudes happiness and homeyness to me.  Colin especially loves this time of year because he's guaranteed a weekend with his cousin, which means non-stop playing.  I love to watch them pick right up where they left off, even if it was 4 months ago that they last saw one another.


I am thankful for the health and wellness of my family.  Lately I have been hearing a lot of sad stories of illness and disease and it just makes me feel so lucky (blessed) that those closest to me are all happy and healthy.  My heart goes out to those that are dealing with sad news and those that are ailing.  It's these times that we take comfort in knowing there's a higher power at work here and some things are out of our control.


I am thankful that I don't have to endure the pain of the Holiday shopping rush every year.  I was one of the crazies out Thanksgiving night, standing in line at Walmart.  I had one thing I wanted and I was on a mission. Wow!  I had no idea how many people participated in the melee of Thanksgiving shopping.  I am disappointed in myself that I let consumerism invade the precious time with my family and I have vowed to never take part again.  It is hard to pass up the monetary savings, but who can put a price on the time spent with family and friends.  I somehow doubt the retail stores will miss little old me, but if we don't take a stand now, Thanksgiving will just be another day in a few years.

30 Days of Thankfulness - Days 19-21

I am thankful for a little boy that has taught me more about myself in the last 5 years than I had learned in my entire lifetime.  It's amazing how children can bring out both the best and the worst in you.  I'm trying to learn to focus on the good and not beat myself up so bad.  It's a daily struggle.

I am thankful for the inquisitive nature of children.  Although it drives me up the wall sometimes, when I'm not being bombarded with incessant questions, I can better appreciate how eager they are to learn.  They're just little sponges trying to soak up as much as they can.  The above picture, for example, was taken by my curious budding photographer.  He loves getting to handle the "big" camera and with a little guidance, he's actually not too bad - dare I say he's better than his dad?!  
I am thankful for city garbage removal.  It may sound silly but just think about having to dispose of your own garbage and I think you'll quickly agree that this is a service you couldn't live without.  It's just like magic to me that we fill it up and Mr. Man comes and carries it off.  Now if we could just come up with a way to not keep piling it in landfills, we'd be in business.  

30 Days of Thankfulness - Days 14-18

Today's thankful post is all about my amazing husband.  When I really stop and think about all that he does for our family, I realize just how much I take for granted.  In an effort to show my appreciation and sincere gratitude for him, here are some of the things that often go unnoticed that I am thankful for.
1. I am thankful that he warms my car for me in the mornings when it's cold outside.  Our new house's garage is barely standing and we choose not to park in it.  That leaves our cars exposed to the elements and it doesn't take too many mornings of a cold tush to realize how much we took our old garage for granted.  Well, my tush isn't quite as cold thanks to my thoughtful and caring husband.
2.  I am thankful that he has taken care of the diaper pail since the day Colin was born.  Sure, I've taken out a bag here and there, but for the most part that's his thing and I am incredibly relieved I don't have to smell stale urine every week!
3.  I am thankful that he does the dishes every night without complaining.  I'm not sure how the whole cycle ever started but his thought process is, I cook the food, the least he can do is clean the dishes.  Amen to that!  I realize not everyone thinks that way, but I sure am glad he does.
4.  I am thankful that he eats the food I put in front of him without complaining.  Not only does he eat the food (now mostly vegetarian), he compliments some aspect of it every meal.  There aren't too many men out there that would be willing to cut out steak and burgers as willingly as he has.  So I am impressed, relieved, and thankful that he has not only accepted it but understands and appreciates why we're doing it.  
5.  I am thankful for the daily love texts he sends.  Sometime throughout the day he sends me a short little note to tell me he loves me or something of the sort.  Just to know that he's thinking about me makes me smile.  It may be short and sweet but it makes my heart flutter every time my phone dings.  
I seriously could go on and on but I'll refrain.  What are you most thankful about in regards to your spouse or loved one?  Have you told them you appreciate them lately?  Guaranteed to put a smile on your face and warm their heart.

30 Days of Thankfulness - Days 11, 12, 13

I am thankful for unexpected warm days that allow us to get outside and do things we don't normally get to do in the middle of November.  It's amazing how much pinned up energy kids can run off just by going to the park!  And how much a little fresh air improves everyone's mood (:

I am thankful for the momentary parental breakthroughs I have from time to time.  One that doesn't always work but is pure bliss when it does is the attempt at a nap for Colin.  He thinks he's way past napping but sometimes momma knows best.  After a fitful attempt to complete a homework assignment, I knew he was exhausted and told him he needed to go take a rest in his room.  He cried, protested, and did all the things I fully expected him to do, but I persisted and told him he didn't have to go to sleep but he had to sit in his bed quietly with 2 books.  What do you know?  He slept for 3 hours and was SO proud that he had slept as long as his baby brother.  Will he remember that the next time I ask him to rest?  Let's not get carried away!
I am thankful for productive days.  I thrive on productivity so when I'm able to mark several things off my endless to-do list, it puts a smile on my face.  It's exhilarating to me to be able to get so much done in one setting.  I love prepping for next week's meals on the weekend and this weekend was no exception.  During the aforementioned 3 hour nap (break), I was able to bake an apple pie, prepare 2 complete meals, and make some granola bars for Colin's lunch.  Not only was I able to get a lot done, the sense of accomplishment put me in a better frame of mind since I didn't have anything hanging over my head - win, win!

30 Days of Thankfulness - Days 8, 9, & 10

I am thankful for cold mornings because they make me appreciate the warm days more!  They're also another reminder how awesome my husband is because he warms up my car (:
I am also thankful for the joyous moments when these 2 play nicely together.  The moments may be rare but I try to stop what I'm doing to just enjoy the moment of brotherly love.  

While we're on the subject of those adorable boys, I am super thankful that they are both good eaters and will try nearly anything at least once.  They both eat a wide array of fruits and vegetables and rarely turn any food down.  How many 2-year olds do you know that choose broccoli over cheese?  This one.

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 7

I am so thankful to have a great friend and coworker who keeps me interested and motivated to learn more about mine and my family's health.  Having someone to talk to regarding new health trends, diet trends, and other lifestyle topics is priceless.  Someone that's on the same page as you and someone who "gets" you is not a person you find every day.  We share recipes, Dr. Oz topics (ha!), and she is a great encourager and supporter.  What a great friend!

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 6

Today, and every day, I'm thankful for my mom.  Since it's likely her name will pop up again some time this month in my thankfulness posts, today I'm specifically thankful for her taxi services.  How she manages to transport 5 kids to and fro on a daily basis and not pull every hair out of her head is beyond me.  I'm reminded just how hard of a task this is every day that I have to pick up both of my children from school - and do it within 30 minutes, so I can rush home to cook dinner.  She carts not only my 2, but also my sister's 3 from school, daycare, practice, appointments, etc.  And somehow she does it all without complaining.  Amazing!  I don't think I tell her enough just how grateful I am for her transportation and her reliability.  Priceless.

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 5

I am thankful for getting to witness my children experience things for the first time.  There are far too many memorable and monumental moments to list here, but sometimes it's the little things that make you stop and smile.  Like last week when Colin requested hot chocolate for his dessert.  Watching him literally lick the cup clean with his chocolate mustache, as he experience this rare treat just made me smile.  I love seeing the innocence before my eyes and getting to relive so many firsts through them.

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 4

I'm thankful for unsolicited hugs and kisses from both of my children.  It's amazing what a tender kiss from a pair of tiny lips can do for your psyche.  The fact that both of my kids still enjoy giving and receiving hugs and kisses is not something I want to take for granted.  I know the day will come (at least "they" say it will) when I'll have to beg for them to even be in the same room as me, so I want to cherish each kiss and each hug until that time.  Maybe I can store them up in a jar!  I want to enjoy the moment and truly appreciate each time they graciously share their affection.

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 3

Today (and every day) I'm thankful for the fact that I live in a city that offers an array of grocery store options.  That may sound ridiculous to some, but it's really important to my family and I that we are able to find the food items that fit our dietary choices.  I'm often reminded of this when I think of Wes' hometown and the fact that they have 1 grocery store to choose from (2 if you count Walmart).  The organic, gluten-free, vegan, and other diet-specific choices are very limited, or even non-existent.   I love having choices and being able to feed my family the way I wish.

30 Days of Thankfulness

Someone started this idea on Facebook several years ago and I loved it!  I love dedicating an entire month to thinking about what you are truly grateful for.  It encourages you to appreciate the things that we take for granted on a daily basis and to be thankful for them.  Sometimes the littlest things really do mean the most.  I want to dig deep and really find the things that make a difference in my day and life.  I should do this every day, but alas, I'm not perfect and an entire month is a good place to start.  This is the November part of my own Happiness Project that I started last month.  

As I approached my car yesterday evening in my work garage, I began to think of where I was headed next.  A women's mind rarely focuses on the present, but rather what's happening next.  It's really a downfall in our DNA but it does help us to stay on track and stay 2 steps ahead.  But I digress.  I knew my next step was to go pick up Colin from school.  That led to a series of thoughts, one of which was, "Do I have his car seat?"  We only have 1 car seat for each child and we rotate them between cars as needed.  When I say "we," I really mean Wes.  At that moment, I smiled and said a silent "thank you" to Wes because that's one thing I rarely have to even think about, without questioning, prodding, or complaining, he rotates Colin's seat in and out of the cars so that I always have it when I need it.  Having one less thing to think about in the morning is fantastic!  I made a mental note to thank Wes when I saw him, so that he knew I really do appreciate it.  
I don't want to take things for granted, but I do.  This month I hope to notice more, give thanks, and praise as much as I can.  I'd like to encourage you to do the same.  What about you, what are you thankful for?

Fall Lineup

Am I the only one looking forward to putting an end to a summer of reruns?  If I hear the theme music for America's Got Talent one more time, I may disconnect my tv.  Seriously, NBC, are you that terrible that you only have one show that garners and ratings and thus, you must put it on auto repeat?!  There are only so many times I need to see Nick Cannon wearing black and white buffalo checked (tight) pants.   I'm not sure the new fall lineup gives me much to be excited about but the promise of some new episodes of existing favorites gives me something to look forward to.  Here are a few of the shows that have at least gotten my attention.  But to quote the ever-annoying, Guy Fieri, you only have "a minute to win it!"  I have a pretty good opinion after just a few minutes and there are no second chances with me.   NBC Guys with Kids:  Looks just lame enough that I have to watch it at least once.  What mother doesn't like to see a man struggle with the job she pulls off every day?  The sunglasses are a pretty good sing this one will be terrible, but I'll watch anything that makes me feel better about myself! CBS

Elementary - Who doesn't love a good Sherlock Holmes/Dr. Watson story?  If Jonny Lee Miller can keep the scruffy look going, I may able to look past the fact that Lucy Liu is not my favorite actress.  I need to have at least one somewhat intellectual contender on the list, so please don't fail me now.  Looks like this one will go straight to DVR because of the time slot, so it might stand a chance since I won't have to watch commercials.   ABC Wes picked this one for me.  His words went something like this, "That looks like something that might be right up your alley - drama and cattiness."  I would argue, but instead, sign me up!  I'll be interested to see if Hayden Panettiere can pull off a more grown-up role. CW

Not surprisingly, this one may end up being the winner of my heart.  Pretty people, current fashion, teenage drama?  My kind of show.  90210 anyone?  I'm going to make a bold prediction that it will be totally predictable, but I'll still tune in each and every week for some mind-numbing entertainment. FOX

I like Mindy Kaling and I like her quirky humor.  I just hope I like Mindy Kaling's humor for 30 minutes.  She and I are basically in the same pursuit of being the best all-round person we can be.  Heck, maybe I'll learn something along the way.  What a novel concept that one could actually get something useful out of a primetime sitcom!

What about you, are there any you're excited about that didn't make my list?

Oh what a night!

I know I'm not the only mother who has stressful days.  I'm not the first or last one to eagerly put the kids to bed so I can enjoy a few minutes of peace and quiet.  I'm not the only one who has fits of frustration and acts out irrationally, only to have regrets later.  I'm not the only mom to feel guilty that I work and that I'm not home with fresh baked cookies waiting on the children when they get home from school.  And I'm certainly not the only imperfect mom.   Even though I know these things, I still make mistakes daily.  I still have moments where I wonder what the heck I'm doing wrong and wish Nanny 911 would come and solve my life's problems.  Even though I know I'm imperfect, I still strive for perfection.  I think it's possible to strive towards perfection, but I'm here to tell you, I don't think it's attainable in the current world. I wanted to share an excerpt of a somewhat typical night at our house.  Not all nights are this chaotic, but there are far more than I'd like.  I share to give you hope that you're not alone, but also to seek advice to see if there's something blatant that I'm missing that could make our routine smoother.   From an email to an understanding friend:

Last night felt like Grand Central Station at our house.  When I drove up, Colin was waiting for me outside with a couple of tomatoes and immediately started in asking about his garden, if the tomatoes were ready, can we pull up the dead cucumber plant, why do the bugs like the plants so much, etc.  I managed to answer all of his questions – even in a rather peaceful manner.  Then I go to the door and Sawyer and Wes are sitting right inside the door, tying Sawyer’s tennis shoes (which are new to him and are practically impossible to remove from his body without him throwing a conniption).  Apparently Sawyer wanted to go out to meet me too.  So he was none too pleased that I was already in the house and he hadn’t gotten to go out.  He begins to wail.  Wes immediately launches into telling me about Colin’s homework assignment that is due in 2 days and that he can't believe they didn't give us more time, blah, blah – all on top of Colin’s incessant tomato talk and Sawyer’s wailing.  Great, I’ve been home 2 minutes and I already want to pull my hair out!

The fun only continued from there.  I began to cook dinner, while Wes “worked” with his stuff spread out all over the kitchen island.  Colin was still babbling and both he and Sawyer wanted to “help” me cook dinner.  Colin was talking a mile a minute and I could not even think what my name was.  Somehow, Wes was managing to actually work?  The boys are moving chairs, cutting with plastic knives, washing vegetables, all within a 5-foot radius of me (and on me)!  I somehow still managed to keep it together and get dinner on the table.  At one point I did tell Wes, “In case you ever wonder why I’m harried when you get home, here’s your answer!”

So we eat dinner and then I delve into Colin’s homework assignment.  At first I didn’t think it was a big deal that it was due in 2 days, that is until I realized he had soccer practice the next night and that only left tonight to get it done.  Well by this point, Sawyer was an absolute mess because he was worn out from his first day at school.  He was crying at my feet, I was trying to read the directions out loud, and Colin was practically doing a handstand in his chair.  Wes was doing dishes for a while and then standing across the island just watching, somehow tuning out the melee that was ensuing.  I bend down to get Sawyer and he’s just like a wet noodle, he’s so tired.  The smart thing to do would have been to stop then and there and put Sawyer to bed but I already had my eye on the prize and I was going to tackle this “project” right then.  Somewhere in the mix, Sawyer accidentally scratches my incision (another story) and I nearly fell out of my chair.  I put him down and am trying to keep my screeching to a minimum.  Well he starts screaming a) that I put him down and b) because he hurt me.  Wes finally picks him up and manages to come up with the idea that he’s tired and should go on to bed.  Hey, great idea!  After more wailing and consoling, Wes gets his milk ready and they’re off upstairs.

Well in the meantime I have come unglued and am totally frustrated with Colin because he’s not listening as I read the directions.  I stop and tell him that I’ll continue when he’s ready to listen because I’m only reading them once.  He finally settles down and we’re able to complete his family tree.  It was supposed to be something that the whole family participated in.  Yes, we sure did!  Not exactly in the manor they probably intended, but we were all present and accounted for. 

Of course after the boys were in bed, the guilty feelings took over and I began to relive the whole process and dissect how and what I should have done differently.  Short of a miracle, I’m not sure I could have done anything different.  What I learned is that we’re going to have to come up with a better way of doing homework, lest I lose every ounce of my patience and sanity.  Just another reminder that there aren’t enough hours in the day!  

  **FYI Friday will return to it's regularly scheduled programming next week.  Pinky swear!