Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Fertile Myrtle

No, thankfully I'm not referring to myself! I am however talking about poor (figulartively and not literally), pitiful Britney Spears. As I was standing in the check out line at Meijer, I started to read the headlines of some of my old favorites - US Weekly, In Touch, OK, and the occassional Enquirer for the laughable dirt. It's not uncommon to see Britney grace the cover of any one of these magazines on a weekly basis, but when I read the headlines that she is pregnant again, I almost couldn't contain myself. I wanted to ask the couple in front of me if I was seeing things but then I remembered who I was talking about and realized it was probably true. Seriously, when is America going to get smart and institute the parental test that Wes and I think is so desperately needed?! It's easy, once you pass the test you are able to procreate - until then, no offspring! The test wouldn't be one of scholastic fortitude, rather basic common sense. For example, do you give a baby soft drinks? Do babies have to ride in car seats? Do you actually have to pay attention and take care of your children? A ready-parent would know the answers to all of these, but Britney, and many others for that matter, would have to give some serious thought to the answers. Why is she given the same title as Mother as I am? I would certainly hope I live up to the title better than she does, or ever will.
As a side note, I also noticed a headline on one of the covers that said she had been caught shoplifting! Why does someone who is worth millions of dollars feel the need to steal underwear from Hustler of all places? Add that to my list of questions for the parent test! And here I thought I was bad because I hadn't made time to get my daily dose of Hollywood gossip - clearly some things will never change.

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