Sunday, May 13, 2012

Being a Mother

Do you ever look back to your childhood and wonder how your mom did it all?  I do, often.  My mom was a teacher, as was my dad, and despite the fact she had to be at school by 7:30, she still managed to cook us a warm breakfast every morning.  That was only after she had gotten up and walked 4 miles, taken a shower, gotten dressed, and gotten us up.  What time did she get up?  It must have been before 5am!

I strive to do much of the same but I'm not on quite the same schedule.  I get up at 6, exercise, get ready, make breakfast (not always a hot one), get the boys ready, fix lunches, and send them on their way with Wes.  Then I have a few moments to enjoy my breakfast and check my email before I head off to work.

Somehow my mom seemed to always have it together - then again, I don't have the best memory so maybe she didn't but I certainly don't remember otherwise.  She cooked all the meals, kept the house practically spotless, chauffeured us around, helped us with our homework, worked a full-time job, and most of all, showed us an endless amount of love and compassion.  I know I'm partial, but she's truly one of a kind.

So in an effort to be a better mom and to try to emulate those before me (that seemed to be able to keep it under control better), here are a few things I've been working on and will continue to work on in my never ending quest to becoming a better mother.

--- I try to make a conscience effort to minimize the use of the word "no."  I try to rephrase the sentence so that I don't have to use the word.
        Colin:  Mom, may I have go outside and play (at 7am)?
        The old me:  No, it's too early.
        The new me:  Sure, after you get home from school today!

--- I try to play and be more jovial with the kids.  It's so easy to fall into a slump after a long day of work but that's just not fair to the kids.  Last night, I let Colin watch a short movie while Sawyer and I romped and wrestled in the playroom.  It was wonderful hearing his little laugh and just snuggling with him as we rolled around on the floor.  Bonus, it made him super tired and willing to go to bed!

--- I try to smile more.  Your kids pick up on your moods and actions and I want them to see that I'm happy.  I love life and want to live it to the fullest.  I want them to want that too and what a better way to show them, by example.

--- I try to think of fun (and inexpensive or free) activities to get us out of the house.  When we've been cooped up for too long, all of our actions and words tend to reflect it.  We all get a bit snippy and it becomes painfully obvious we need a change of scenery and/or some fresh air.

--- I try to teach and encourage them to treat others as they want to be treated.  We're at the crucial age where sharing, listening, using kind words and gentle touches are being taught and learned.  I'm making efforts to be consistent with my punishments and consequences and following through.

--- I try to kiss them more, hug longer, and truly listen and make eye contact when they speak to me.  I cherish every minute I'm with them and I want them to know and appreciate that.

Having my mom around is a not only a blessing but it's also been a great reminder of the person I'm striving to be.  She is strong, insightful, beautiful, loving, and smart.  I want to be just like her when I grow up!



  1. Such an inspiring post! I hope I can do everything as well as you :)

  2. Oh, Kerstin, I have you fooled! Thank you for the kind words and I have no doubt you'll be a terrific mother!

  3. Oh my goodness, I love everything there is to love about the words in the post and the pictures of you and your handsome boys are to die for! :) Happy Mama's Day!

  4. Love these pics! Such a sweet post. My mom recently moved to my town and I am so loving having that relationship as part of my everyday life. Hope you had a fantastic Mother's Day!

  5. What a great post, Danielle! You are such a great example of motherhood. I love how you are aiming to not use the word "no". I'm going to challenge myself to the same thing. It's sounds much more positive. My mom was like your mom. She was supermom - spotless house, meals on the table (I never ate at drive-thrus), etc. Maybe our moms secretly broke down after we went to bed. Who knows? Keep up the great work, friend!

  6. Dear Danielle,
    I think you are doing an excellent job. Yes by all means have fun. The unorganized drawers and messy bathroom will wait. You are doing what is right now! Keep on keeping on!

    1. Thank you so much, Cindy! I will gladly accept all the words of encouragement that I can (: