A Funny For Your Wednesday

I'll preface this story by saying this is only funny because it didn't happen to me and I didn't have to deal with it but I did feel terrible for my mother! 

A bit of background before we begin.  Colin has had nap issues for a while now.  It began pre-Sawyer, so that's not the cause.  We've tried a lot of different things and now he'll basically sleep for me and at one of his schools (the other one is ends at noon) but that's it!  My poor mother has tried to duplicate my every step but alas, Colin refuses to sleep at her house - to the point where he'll blatantly tell you that, "I'm not going to take a night-night."

So after asking me again exactly how I got him to take a nap, my mom braced herself to try again.  She took him to bed, kicking and crying, and laid him down.  After 5 minutes, she heard nothing and she was encouraged.  She held her breath and went on about her business.  A few minutes later, here comes Colin with no pants and no underwear on.  He told her that he had pooped but he had cleaned it up!  He was very matter of fact about it.  In his hands was his underwear that was wringing wet!  My mom started to get up, only to be told, "No Buff, you just sit right there, I've taken care of it.  I don't want you to come back to my room right now.  I'll can get my own underwear."

My mom is no dummy and waited about 2 minutes before heading back there.  When she opened the door, she found him with his underwear on inside out, still no pants, an entire cubby of books spread out all over the floor, and the markers.  THE MARKERS!  He had used them to draw tattoos on his feet, legs, and a throw rug.  Thank goodness the carpet was spared but I'm sure it would have only been a matter of time before it was colored on as well.  My mom asked him why he did it and he didn't know.  She said we don't color on these things, do we?  He said no, we color in coloring books.

I'm not sure if he was bored or just being mischievous but whichever it is, he's getting very good at it!  My mom didn't see any traces of the poop or any wet spots.  She asked him where it was and he said, as if she was a total moron, "In the toilet!"

I later asked him why he went in his pants and he said, "Sometimes you just have to go so badly that you don't make it to the toilet.  I just couldn't make it." 

What could I say to that? 


No Buff, you just sit right there, I've taken care of it.  Don't come back to my room.